Thursday, April 26, 2018

Desperation Follow Up


     I should follow up that desperation is certainly no requirement to growing up and it will undoubtedly necessitate a prolonged period of selfishness, much to the dismay and heart-wrenching pain of our loved ones. Desperation is a last resort.

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

The Gift of Desperation?


     So is desperation a gift? It certainly can be, depending on the individual.

     A good anecdote is a cocky teenager who drinks and gets high and is still having fun with it. Why would a clueless adolescent ingrate get better while he's out there having a blast and hasn't suffered any profound life consequences yet? They have no need nor any will to change because, let's be honest, they don't really have to yet. They are still in la-la land, and even when they have legal trouble, they usually get to walk right out. They haven't lost their families, their bodies, their minds, and they have no understanding of money and the world, so they don't feel the weight of survival and adult responsibilities. The twisted irony is that we don't want to stop until we can't stop - until we've completely lost control and no longer have the ability to stop.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Copyright Infringement

     I never really cared or bothered to check, but a few simple, targeted searches revealed my stuff plagiarized quite a bit. Entire pieces were copied and pasted with false attribution or none at all. I also found many quotes literally copied into another graphic with someone else's name at the bottom. LOL. While I guess it is somewhat flattering, it is also something I wouldn't dream of doing myself.

     Yes, this is at best a shabby attempt at community service and yes, all I really care about is that it's out there and useful to people, but how about we give it proper attribution? You don't even have to use my name - you can just say this is from The Privileged Addict or whatever.

     So if I may, all of my blog pieces, books and quotes are copyrighted. The Library of Congress is a real place and there can be real consequences. I certainly don't have the time or the will to pursue copyright infringement, and like I said, I don't particularly care all that much, but whoever you are really pissed off my kid. 😎

We will get you...

Friday, April 6, 2018

Blind Faith - Revised from 2012



     Blind faith is the key to getting better...

     Alcoholics and addicts are obstinate and tend to worship their own intellect, if you can call it that. We think we can get ourselves better if and when we choose, which is a fallacy. And no matter how smart we think we are, our minds have instead become narrow and limited. We demand to see results. We demand to know exactly what it is that will fix us before we even begin. We want to see it to believe it... but that may be the one thing standing in the way of getting better.

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

When Dealing With a Narcissist... Don't Fight, Don't Engage, Forget about Analysis, Forget about the Past, Forget about Trying to Change Them... Just Move On

 
Comment:

Hi Charlie,

     I found you looking for answers. I have raised two children on my own due to the fact their mother is an addict with mental illness. She never was able to make it back to the sane world. My kids have grown up great do to my sacrifices. One 19 in college and one 25 who graduated. I have now found myself back after all these years dealing with an alcoholic for 4 years. The alcoholic high functioning and has co occurring illness. On paper she is the best catch a guy could want. She is aware of the issues but has strung me alone for years with getting help but never doing it. One or two meetings and being let go by therapists. I read your book and passed it on and it gave me hope that people can change. Most people say the addict will never change. I’m not much of a religious person but I am trying to be spiritual and open minded. I have faith and hope for people and I strive to be the best I can be everyday. That’s the message I send out to my loved ones. At least try and move forward. You are right time to grow up. I did. I have battled with the idea about the destruction and pure meanness an addict and whether the disease is driving or is the narcissism/sociopath driving the storm. My addict has cut me out of her life because I stopped enabling and wanted them to best healthy. It’s hard lesson to learn and painful but I reread your writing and can’t wait for more. It truly helps out here. Thanks for your dedication.

Derek

Sunday, April 1, 2018

Anybody Can Take Steps - Introduction



"Life beings at the end of our comfort zone." - Neale Donald Walsh

 


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INTRODUCTION

    
     Anybody can take Steps, not just alcoholics and addicts. We are told to carry this message to others who suffer from addiction, but what about everybody else? Why hoard a process that can induce miracles? Shouldn’t everybody have access to these powerful and life-changing tools? Shouldn’t those we love feel the relief and serenity that we have procured for ourselves? 
     Letting go is a miracle. Once our basic needs are met, this is the secret to inner peace and happiness. If we can mentally/emotionally let go of all that is around us and inside of us, we can accept everything. We will have touched the great voice within and thus, the power of God. We can then touch the fabric of our universe and it is in this harmony that we continue to expand, know ourselves and give back. We’ll get more into letting go in Chapters 3 and 11, but to experience this inner evolution is something you do not want to miss.

To Recover Is To Grow Up & Restore Our Conscience

     We speak of fundamental change for the addict who seeks to get better. The Big Book refers to this as an "entire psychic cha...