Showing posts from February, 2016

What I Learned from Taking a Break

It's not necessarily what you do, it's how you do it. Similarly, It's not necessarily what you say, it's how you say it. What is our intention?


What I (re)learned from taking a break:
     1) That I can know something intellectually (and literally be writing and discussing it on a daily basis) yet fail repeatedly to practice it in my life. That I can hear something I already know said in a different way and it suddenly fires neurons that continue sleeping when I myself am the one regurgitating it.

     2) Accept everything. That is the secret to inner peace. Shamefully, I actually began to think that the stuff that bothered me was because of the stuff that bothered me, and that IT needed to change for me to be okay. Then I actually heard something useful in a meeting as we were reading one of the stories in the back of the Big Book, the theme of which was acceptance. The guy writes about his wife and their dynamic as his alcoholism progressed. He began to see her de…

Response to 18 Year Old Pothead

A young pothead wrote me to tell me that his mom is a big fan but wanted some validation on a horrifying injustice he has been suffering at the hands of his awful mom, who has suspended his driving privileges for 30 days for smoking pot. Unbelievable!!! How could any parent not want their child to rip bong hits all day long? I don't get it! Seems like an entirely reasonable request, regardless of the inconvenient fact that smoking pot all day as his brain is still developing is incredibly stupid or that he is still living under the roof of his parents who raised him from birth.

     But if you think that is a brutal injustice, wait till you here this: she has a glass of wine at night!!!! The hypocrisy!!! A parent in their own house drinking wine! It's almost too much. I'm offended. In case you haven't been able to deduce the powerful logic here, the argument goes something like this: if mom drinks some wine at night, I should be able to get lit up all day long like…

Meetings = Mild Form of Torture

Sorry, had to do it. I had to write a blog or two during this little hiatus. It's like when food builds up in the disposal and that sludgy food water starts building up in the sink and you just can't wait to flip that switch and churn it up so the water can drain out. And yes this is a meeting rant, so if you are particularly defensive about your meetings, you should either click away or start rehearsing your angry troll response now ;)

     Before we get started, a recent email from a reader/incredible mom suggested I write a book to free parents from the shame and guilt they feel about their addicted children by exposing the fact that our addiction has nothing to do with them and is 0% their fault. Sounds like a great idea to me, and I've already thought of a title: "Blameless POAs". Until then, I guarantee you that about 99% of these posts will also free you from unnecessary and unfounded guilt and shame ;)

     So I sucked it up like a big boy and ac…

I'll Send a Book to Any Treatment Facility

I just thought of this after a recent correspondence, but if any parents, spouses, addicts or alcoholics, including those who have previously reached out to me, would like me to send a copy of The Privileged Addict and/or Anybody Can Take Steps to any treatment facility or sober house etc. where your child/spouse is staying or has stayed, or where you are staying or have stayed, please feel free to email me the address at and I'll have my distributor send them out immediately.


ACTS Now Available on Amazon ;)

Amazon Paperback Link
iTunes Link
*Don't forget to review the book on Amazon (unless you hated it;) Thanks!
*Also will be available on Kindle, Nook, Kobo etc. very soon

“Recovery is not a function of time. It is a function of what actions we take and at what frequency we take them.”

     Do you know an addict or an alcoholic? Is it your son, daughter or spouse? Is it you? Or perhaps you have lost power over something else such as depression, anger, food, sex or gambling? There are few words that can describe the pain that a loss of power causes - the toll it takes on our minds, hearts and spirits, the endless ripple effects and the victims that lie in its wake. Shouldn’t those we love feel the relief and the freedom that the recovered have procured for themselves? And don’t we all deserve access to these powerful and life-changing tools? Anybody can lose power and therefore anybody can take steps.

     The Twelve Steps are not just that poster hanging on the wall during a m…

Taking a Break

James 1:26 - If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion [is] vain. 
Matthew 6:1 - Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.  *
     Taking a little break to work on myself a bit. I may even start a local Step meeting, if you can fathom. People like me need to step back from time to time and check ourselves. I personally need to make a greater effort to pray and meditate more, nourish myself and my family, and oh yeah, have some fun. Hypocrisy is one of the worst of sins.

     If you value this writing and message, please help spread the word to others about the blog and the books. The Privileged Addict memoir is my own story intertwined with the education I received up North, as well as the specific process I undertook to recover and induce a mind-altering spiritual experience. Anybody Can Take Steps attempts t…

A Vision For You

     "Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us. 
     Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.
     May God bless you and keep you—until then." - Alcoholics Anonymous p.164

     I used, drank and selfishly wallowed in various mutations of severe depression and dysfunction fo…

An Allergy and a Mental Obsession

From The Privileged Addict, pp.83-91 (Copyright, 2012):

      "I did nothing for the first three days up North but chain smoke cigarettes. The staff refused to treat me until some of the fog burned off. Finally, after ripping apart my perception of conventional recovery and mainstream AA, I was offered a solution that really works. They began reading the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous to me like I was a child, or rather, a student. They taught me that I could recover completely… and for good. I don’t have to live forever ‘in recovery.’ There is hope for me and for every addict in the world.
     The beginning of the Big Book contains a letter from Dr. William D. Silkworth, who repeatedly treated AA’s co-founder, Bill Wilson, at Charles B. Towns hospital in New York. Towns Hospital was once a giant in the field of drug and alcohol addiction. But the doctor admits to the public and concedes to himself that he cannot help most chronic…

Some Logic on Dopamine

Specialists now say that addicts lack endogenous opioids and need more dopamine (more drugs) and that is why they engage in drug-seeking behavior. The truth is that we need the exact opposite. We need to get used to being human. The frantic, neurochemical "let's just medicate 'em!" crowd are not just dead wrong, but at this point they are becoming dangerous. Sorry.
     All drugs and alcohol act on the dopaminergic reward system of the brain. Neurochemically speaking, addicts essentially become addicted to increased levels of dopamine. Why? Not because of some shitty childhood or lack of connection, but because it feels good. Addicts like drugs and alcoholics like alcohol because they love the way it makes them feel. It's purely selfish. We mutate ourselves into addicts and only we can mutate ourselves back into decent, productive, sober human beings, with the help of God, of course.

     At any rate, bio-chemical theories and pharmaceutical remedies will come a…