It was one of the worst mistakes I've ever made in my life. Among countless other reasons, the hellish torture of coming off of Methadone will propel even the best of us right back to Methadone or just back heroin to relieve the mind-blowing pain. It also drove me insane. What it did to my brain and personality is beyond words. Truly, Methadone turned me into a freak.
Harm reduction is basically an oxymoron. Think about how ridiculous the mentality is. We're still going to harm you, just not quite as much (and the 'not quite as much' part is highly debatable). It reminds me of the government's deficit/debt nonsense. We're still going to accumulate debt, just at a slightly lower rate of ascent. Huh? Use some logic and just break it down for a sec. If our problem is talking and using drugs (as opposed to action and sobriety), what could be more contrary to a solution for addicts than more talking and more drugs?
One of the most horrible things Methadone did to me is it coiled the spring inside that eventually exploded and led to the worst run I ever went on, the last one, the one that nearly ended me. Harm reduction sounds like quite the approachable and clever term, but take a moment and think about how ridiculous this notion of 'meeting them where they are' really is. Meeting us where, in full blown opiate addiction? Lol. How does that unchain us from opiate addiction or fix a mind that has gone completely insane? The addict MUST detox completely and remain abstinent before any real progress or recovery can occur, and they should detox right away.
The Methadone pumpers love to attack people who are honest, accusing them of stigmatizing, criticizing, demeaning and outcasting addicts on Methadone. First of all, stuff like this, including addiction, SHOULD be stigmatized in an effort to push the addict to reach for something worthwhile, something better. If we accept Methadone as some wonderful solution, why would anyone go off of it? You have to understand how addicts think. If the people around us are satisfied and love us on 120 milligrams of Methadone, we're gonna hit that clinic everyday for the rest of our shitty lives.
The problem with addicts who go on Methadone is that they want to stay high and have zero intention of actually getting better. I know that will piss tons of people off, but deep down it's true, and how is what I write any worse than pumping Methadone under some cloak of compassion and science when really it is harming, not helping? Believe me, I'm really trying to help.
|Right from the CDC - "Methadone Linked to 30% of Prescription Painkiller Overdose Deaths"|
The real problem with Methadone is that every doctor, clinic, government agency, CDC shill, parent and addict who advocates it doesn't understand addiction. In the above article, they are at pains to note that these deaths are probably not from treating addicts but from normal people using Methadone for pain. Lol, right. It's not the addicts overdosing on Methadone, it's regular people.
An active addict who continues using will continue to suffer from the mental obsession. He or she will continue to have an addict mind and heart, a brain that is insane and subject to relapse at any point in time. The addict within is still very much alive and well and they are simply biding time before the switch goes off and they go back out and on an EPIC RUN. You have done nothing but coil a spring, one that when it explodes may very well end the person you are supposedly trying to help.
To me, it's just so obvious, even scientifically. You cannot treat opiate addiction with more opiates. All you are doing is changing brands, and instead of stealing just from your parents, you are stealing from every taxpayer in America. Methadone is without question the most insane form of treatment ever created, pumped and justified by the delusional advocates. Sorry.
From The Privileged Addict, p.134-35:
"As the Methadone begins to run out, all there is for relief is the Xanax… then all of those are gone. First, all of my energy is sucked out of me. I’m beyond lethargic. My muscles feel like they weigh a thousand pounds. Moving anywhere becomes a struggle. Indescribable stomach pain begins, accompanied by sweats and chills. It’s the middle of the summer, temperature in the mid-nineties, and I’m freezing. I go around in pants and four shirts on, including a flannel jacket. My clothes hang off me, and if it isn’t clear that I’m a pathetic drug addict, I can easily be mistaken for a male anorexic.
The pain gets worse and worse and is loyally followed by psychological torture. I feel like I’m going crazy. I become so frustrated, I pull my hair out, punch myself in the head, and bang my head against the wall. I hate myself.
No appetite either. I mean zero fucking appetite. The thought of food makes me sicker and more depressed, forget about the constant reminder that I’ve been reduced to a Methadone-sick waif, writhing in bed. I try drinking a protein shake one morning. As soon as I gulp the shake, I throw it back up into the glass. I try to swallow it again and throw it up again. I manage to keep some down each time, so I repeat this swallowing and puking process over and over until the chocolate-flavored protein shake is gone. Protein shakes have to do it for a few days because I just can’t swallow food.
For some reason, I attempted a summer course at UMASS Boston. I think I did it to feign productivity. Sweating and shaking, I tried to participate, but while answering a question, I blacked out in mid-sentence from a benzodiazepine seizure. Waking back up, I apologized out loud to the entire room. Absolutely no idea how much time had passed. I think all the normal people around me were so boggled by my condition that they just sat there in dead silence. No one looked in my direction. Not even the professor responded to my awkward apology. The side effects of Methadone alone will cause an addict to relapse or eat more, just to get out of the hell."