Saturday, October 11, 2014

No Character Defects? Huh???

     Someone (anonymous, of course) left this comment on, Why Alcoholics Hurt People.

     "Speak for yourself. Addicts are individuals like any other variety of human being-not ghouls riddled with character defects. Try lightening up on yourself, and stop painting others with broad brush strokes."

     Anyone who knows anything about addiction and recovery knows that we never lighten up on ourselves. Sure we trust in our recovery and we respect ourselves, and no we're not doormats and no we do not beat ourselves up. Beating ourselves up is a form of self-pity, whereas being honest about our skewed and destructive ways of thinking, speaking and behaving is a loving act and has nothing to do with not lightening up on ourselves.

     This is truly one of the most asinine comments I've ever received, and I've been called a sick, evil, piece of shit, idiot, moron, new-age satanist, psychopath, child abuser, even rapist. I'd rather be called all sorts of delusional filth than to see this sort of astounding ignorance. How do people not understand that addicts and alcoholics are preoccupied with self-comfort, escape and distraction, and therefore obviously have a character problem? We don't just have some brain disease that we were randomly afflicted with, as if we are victims of addiction. My God, have we really come to this?  

     So regarding the idiotic suggestion that I lighten up on myself, when it comes to addiction, I will never lighten up until I the day that I die because I actually care about my recovery and take addiction seriously, given it does more harm and damage to others than this person has the ability to fathom. And I also care about recovering in the real and strong way as opposed to selfishly relying on easier, softer ways like suboxone and methadone and naltrexone and vivitrol and on and on.

     I also refuse to lighten up because my family who I've hurt deeply deserves that I don't lighten up. They deserve that I take my health seriously and to suggest otherwise is beyond the pale. Taking my character defects seriously is the very thing that has gotten me to where I am today. Taking my life, my mind, my physical survival and the condition of my very soul seriously has enabled me to recover from addiction, gain a spiritual life, become successful, create a beautiful family, and serve other addicts and their families.

     Finally, go talk to anyone who loves or has to deal with an active drug addict or alcoholic and I'm quite sure they will confirm the substance of the post in question. Perhaps we could engage in a modicum of critical analysis before characterizing (no pun intended) what it is that I do here.

     It's sad, really, because people are becoming completely brainwashed by this new and twisted version of the disease model. They completely misunderstand it what the disease model means. Why would an addict need to become open and honest and other-centered and service-oriented and develop a moral compass and do the right thing and grow along spiritual lines in order to get better? Obviously there is much more going on than the physiological & chemical dynamics of addiction. 

     Sorry, but you can't get around that... though I do see how much easier it would be to pretend to be less of a coward than you really are when you are writing anonymously ;-) Why is it such a big deal to tell the truth about the essence of a drug addiction and the persona of an active alcoholic or drug addict? It doesn't mean we're evil psychopaths, but it is reality.

    To note, a "ghoul" is 'an evil spirit or phantom, especially one supposed to rob graves and feed on dead bodies.' Lol. Don't be so hard on yourself, anonymous. You're not a ghoul. Just a little clueless. Pun intended. 

2 comments:

  1. Dear Charlie,
    I agree with you 100%.
    As Taylor Swift sings...."The haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. I'm just gonna shake it off, I shake it off".
    LOL. You are a blessing and you continue to help me every day.
    Thank you!

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    Replies
    1. Dear Liz,
      That's why you are the best... and why I should send you Taylor Swift tickets. Bless you.

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